Thoughts: Ready is something you can’t be ready for!

Slam-em Khan is back, not too bright but yea he is back.

To get a few things straight, this is NOT a Quentin Tarantino…so NO there will not be a Pulp Fiction feel to it, this is NOT a Akiro Kurosawa, so NO there will not be a grandiose movie, this is NOT a Cameroon or a Spielberg, so again NO NO, there is NOT going to be some mind blowing special effects and this is NOT a Karan Johar, so not there is not NRI rich family rona dhona crap (thank God for that one!!). This is an Arbaaz Khan….so YES it will be mindless, dumb, PJ filled, and silly action thrown in a SALMAN KHAN movie. And YES despite your best attempts you can’t help but laugh at the movie cause it seems just oh so stupid!

Ready is the remake of a South Indian movie and at the risk of being racist, the movie’s inspiration shows in each and every scene. The dialogues are something Javed Akthar would slap himself on his face for and Asin’s role could be done by any women in the industry….ANY industry/ANY sector/ANY geography/ANY species.

The movie’s plot (although I doubt it made any effect on the movie per se) is that Prem (Sallu bhai) is a spoilt son of a rich man Rajveer (Mahesh Manjarekar) and who helps lovers in distress. Prem, as luck would have it, ends up helping Sanjanna aka Pooja (Asin, Dear Lord save us from her acting. If she got any worse she would be held responsible for my death and the people I spray with my Uzi in the theatre. There is a better chance of one of the wax statues from Madam Tussad’s coming to life and doing a better job!!). Prem helps Sanjanna run away from her arranged marriage which was set up by her uncle’s, namely one Bade Mama (Sharad Saxena) and the other Chote mama (Akhilendra Mishra) along with the usual riff raff that stand as henchmen looking over her. The two uncles are at war with each other over Sanjanna’s Rs 200 crore left by her mother to her. Prem tricks everyone with ideas that even the Wile E Coyote along with the entire range of Akme products could not come up with and surprise surprise gets the girl. He wins her heart; he convinces them to give up their life of crime and wins their hearts as well. (Thunderous applause) Any more info in the story would probably ensure no one would go to watch the movie.

The movie as expected revolves around Salman Khan with his usual roadside style, he probably has found what he can do in a movie and he does it well! Asin is just plain irritating; her acting ‘talent’ is a joke. She would be better of providing the voice for Donald/Daisy duck in the next Disney movie than trying her hand at movies for real. Paresh Rawal is a welcome sight and he does what he does best…

As usual Salman Khan Movies are in a niche of their own and really you can’t expect a Clockwork Orange or Shawshank Redemption from him. What you can expect from him is ‘dinka chika dinka chicka dinka chicka” (for those who don’t know what I am talking about, stop living on a rock people and switch on the tube for awhile) and the best part of that is, he is great at the role!

I can’t say more about the movie apart from the statement that, depending upon your tolerance for the unimaginable you can either enjoy the movie or suffer through it. Consider this my disclaimer. The movie is worth it but it does come at the expense of your grey cells shrinking.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: